Humor Quote by P.G. Wodehouse — Inspiring Words on Life, Love & Wisdom

“It was one of the dullest speeches I ever heard. The Agee woman told us for three quarters of an hour how she came to write her beastly book, when a simple apology was all that was required.”

“Gussie, a glutton for punishment, stared at himself in the mirror.”

“I could see that, if not actually disgruntled, he was far from being gruntled.”

“A melancholy-looking man, he had the appearance of one who has searched for the leak in life's gas-pipe with a lighted candle.”

“He had the look of one who had drunk the cup of life and found a dead beetle at the bottom.”

“You're one of those guys who can make a party just by leaving it. It's a great gift.”

“The last time I wore an animal hide; but this time I settled for this." Eric had been wearing a long trench coat. Now he threw it off dramatically, and I could only stand and stare. Normally, Eric was a blue-jeans-and-T-shirt kind of guy. Tonight, he wore a pink tank top and Lycra leggings[...]They were pink and aqua, like the swirls down the side of Jason's truck.”

“Substitute 'damn' every time you're inclined to write 'very;' your editor will delete it and the writing will be just as it should be.”

“Headline?" he asked.”

“Many people, meeting Aziraphale for the first time, formed three impressions: that he was English, that he was intelligent, and that he was gayer than a treeful of monkeys on nitrous oxide.”

“Intelligent men are dangerous.”

“I like to see the glass as half full, hopefully of jack daniels.”