Humor Quote by Darynda Jones — Inspiring Words on Life, Love & Wisdom

“I do not," I felt oddly appalled by her statement. "I'm an excellent liar. Ask my dentist. He swears I floss regularly.”

“You know you have ADD when Look A chicken - T-shirt”

“There is a great need for a sarcasm font.”

“Never knock on death's door. Ring the doorbell then run. He totally hates that.”

“Insanity does NOT run in my family. It strolls through, takes its time, and gets to know everyone personally. —T-SHIRT”

“Want coffee?" I asked, as I headed that way.”

“Adventures are never fun while you're having them.”

“When life hands you a lemon, say, 'Oh yeah, I like lemons! What else ya got?”

“Let's pick it up," the man behind her said. "How many more of the tranquilizers do you have?”

“Nothing is safe from you. If I were to court a girl who lived on an iceberg in the middle of the ocean, sooner or later— probably sooner— I’d look up to see you swooping overhead on a broomstick. In fact, by now I’d be disappointed in you if I didn’t see you.”

“If you reject the food, ignore the customs, fear the religion, and avoid the people, you might better stay home.”

“the [coat] rack above his head like a javelin.”