Humor Quote by Dorothy Parker — Inspiring Words on Life, Love & Wisdom

“Men seldom make passes at girls who wear glasses.”

“That would be a good thing for them to cut on my tombstone: Wherever she went, including here, it was against her better judgment.”

““By the time you swear you're his,”

“If all the girls attending [the Yale prom] were laid end to end, I wouldn't be at all surprised.”

“The best way to keep children at home is to make the home atmosphere pleasant, and let the air out of the tires.”

“It costs me never a stab nor squirm / To tread by chance upon a worm. / Aha, my little dear, / I say, Your clan will pay me back one day.”

“Close your eyes and picture it. Can you see it?”

“Thou shalt not submit thy god to market forces.”

“My doctor told me to stop having intimate dinners for four. Unless there are three other people.”

“Carpe Scrotum. Seize life by the testicles”

“Either get out of bed or else take your clothes off," he said. "I'm not in the mood to compromise.”

“I swear, my dear. Sometimes our conversations remind me of a broken sword.”