Humor Quote by Jim Butcher — Inspiring Words on Life, Love & Wisdom

“On the whole, we're a murderous race. According to Genesis, it took as few as four people to make the planet too crowded to stand, and the first murder was a fratricide. Genesis says that in a fit of jealous rage, the very first child born to mortal parents, Cain, snapped and popped the first metaphorical cap in another human being. The attack was a bloody, brutal, violent, reprehensible killing. Cain's brother Abel probably never saw it coming. As I opened the door to my apartment, I was filled with a sense of empathic sympathy and intuitive understanding. For freaking Cain.”

“Hell’s bells. I don’t call him the Fist of God as a pet name, folks.”

“It bothered me that he was right. Without Sir Stuart's intervention, I'd have been dead again already.”

“If your opponent has you by fifty pounds, winning a fight against him is a dubious proposition, at best. If your opponent has you by eight thousand and fifty pounds, you’ve left the realm of combat and enrolled yourself in Road-kill 101. Or possibly in a Tom and Jerry cartoon.”

“I love being a wizard. Every day is like Disneyland.”

“Roger, he has a chain saw," I hissed. "I am not going to die in Kentucky!”

“Where are you going?”

“The reason for the unreason with which you treat my reason , so weakens my reason that with reason I complain of your beauty.”

“I always listen to you. Except when I don't.”

“hermes has threatened me with slow mail. lousy Internet service and a horrible stock market if i publish this story. I hope he is just bluffing.”

“If our Founding Fathers wanted us to care about the rest of the world, they wouldn't have declared their independence from it.”