Humor Quote by Dark Jar Tin Zoo — Inspiring Words on Life, Love & Wisdom

“Making love to me is amazing. Wait, I meant: making love, to me, is amazing. The absence of two little commas nearly transformed me into a sex god.”

“To find out if she really loved me, I hooked her up to a lie detector. And just as I suspected, my machine was broken.”

“I love being in love, but I also love other things, like not being jealous, overly sensitive, or needy.”

“If I could bronze my love, it’d be worthy of a silver medal.”

“I had a dream about you. We installed Dr. Robert Jarvik’s artificial heart in a mannequin and brought it to life, only to later kill it because a creature that’s all fake heart and no brain is what’s commonly called a “politician,” and must be destroyed.”

“If you have the woman you love, what more do you need? Well, besides an alibi for the time of her husband’s murder.”

“Basically, all women are nurturers and healers, and all men are mental patients to varying degrees.”

“Bite me, Harry Potter.”

“I'm a 21st-century kid trapped in a 19th-century family.”

“Coach Hedge came pounding up the stairs with Hazel at his hooves.”

“You want sensitive and understanding, stick with the therapist.You want great,”

“How are you feeling?”