Humor Quote by Christopher Moore — Inspiring Words on Life, Love & Wisdom

“If you think anyone is sane you just don't know enough about them.”

“I've tried to get the angel to watch MTV so I can learn the vocabulary of your music, but even with the gift of tongues, I'm having trouble learning to speak hip-hop. Why is it that one can busta rhyme or busta move anywhere but you must busta cap in someone's ass? Is "ho" always feminine, and "muthafucka" always masculine, while "bitch" can be either? How many peeps in a posse, how much booty before baby got back, do you have to be all that to get all up in that, and do I need to be dope and phat to be da bomb or can I just be "stupid"? I'll not be singing over any dead mothers until I understand.”

“Christmas crept into Pine Cove like a creeping Christmas thing: dragging garland, ribbon, and sleigh bells, oozing eggnog, reeking of pine, and threatening festive doom like a cold sore under the mistletoe.”

“She's so small, yet she contains so much evil.”

“There's some heinous fuckery goin' on mon.”

“...slow and drunk is no match for fast and scared shitless.”

“Bravo," said Grimalkin, peering down from Cold Tom's chest. "The Winter prince and Oberon's jester agreeing on something. The world must be ending.”

“Fine! I'll throw on some clothes. Turn around. I'm in my pj's”

“Take a nap in a fireplace and you'll sleep like a log.”

“Everyone is born creative; everyone is given a box of crayons in kindergarten. Then when you hit puberty they take the crayons away and replace them with dry, uninspiring books on algebra, history, etc. Being suddenly hit years later with the 'creative bug' is just a wee voice telling you, 'I'd like my crayons back, please.”

“Still it might be nice, once in a while, not to have to choose between evils. Just once, couldn't I choose the lesser good?”